Fall Cleanup 2014 -- Some nice updates

I had Alberto's crew in here for a major cleanup and some revisions to my yard.  A crew of 8 for three days, including a backhoe for one day.  They completely tore down and rebuilt my rock retaining wall in the front.  And they built some sturdy access steps, retaining walls and pathway on the west of the house to replace a very dangerous stair I had built myself out of concrete blocks.  I had them cut down some perennials but leave others that were still blooming or offering texture and color in the yard.

The yard has truly never looked more beautiful.  And, in fact, I realized this is the first time in the 35 years I've lived here that every corner of this large, steep yard was completely cleaned up and landscaped.  What a great feeling it was to see it.  Here are some pics.

The rock wall was completely torn down and rebuilt adding about a ton of dirt to the support base.  They used only the large and medium boulders and not the smaller rocks.  Grass was removed from between the wall and sidewalk and replaced with some nice grasses and other water-tolerant plants.  At the top, new ground cover vines.  The wall looks lovely.  And the gopher infestation is gone, too.

 The steps the crew added on the west side were a surprise.  This is a narrow and unusable strip that I haven't really done anything with in the past.  I had built my own stairway out of concrete blocks. But they slid and were unstable in the sandy soil.  But I wanted this access from front to back yard without having to go the long way around.  I never worried much about aesthetics as it's not seen from the street and borders unkempt neighbor yards.  But I love what the guys built for me this time.  It's not just functional, but also beautiful and blends with my rustic, park-like yard.

 Frankie gets ready to try out the new steps.

 My yard extends just to where the dark bark mulch is here.  The workers used my blocks and patio bricks along with some new railroad ties cut to make a nice wide and solid stairway.  I'll no longer need my hiking boots to get up this steep hill.

 A couple of new retaining walls and some staggered patio tiles made for a nice flat pathway along the base of the deck, above.

 With all the weeds and excess ground cover replaced by wonderfully fragrant bark mulch, the area is pretty to look at, too.  I will keep it this way, as the Virginia Creeper that used to be here was a big draw to rodents and pests like skunks and raccoons.

 Frankie practices his beam routine on the retaining wall.

 Russian Sage, hummingbird trumpet and other flowers are putting on one final color show.  Some of these plants will not get cut down until I have the crew back to rake up autumn leaves.

 The wisteria bush we are working on developing into a tree.  Alberto is going to build a metal arch for us to train the tree and allow the branches to drape down from higher up.

 The corner front flower bed gained some new space with the changes in the rock wall.  More plantings in the spring here.

 Gardens along the driveway.  Color, texture, height.  My haphazard method of planting somehow looks pretty to my eye.  Maybe not everyone's cup of tea, but it sure pleases me.

 Backyard all weeded and tidy.  I need to remove dead plants from the pots now.

 The shade garden's first year was a success.  A few more plants here next year.

 More shade garden.  I'll remove the remaining iris here and move them to a sunnier spot where they will bloom again.

 Some sedum puts on a late bloom.

 The upper corner garden had a serious gopher infestation.  I cut down day lilies and other plants some weeks ago to conduct all out war.  Sadly, I lost one of my trees to the gophers.  They ate the roots completely away and chewed through the irrigation drip tubing.  Two other trees appear to be compromised, but we think we saved them.  New plants were added here and I still have more plans for adding plantings in the spring.  Trying to get to the point where I have no annuals in these corner beds, but have color blooming from spring through fall.

 Recent new small plants added along the east sidewalk.  I hope they live and add some new variety next year.

 More new plants.  So far, so good.

 One of several patches of asters that are the last bloomers of the season.

 Front garden.  A little more sedate and tame than the rest of the yard.

 

The seldom-used upper level up the steep hill from my backyard.  A few years ago Alberto made this pretty round patio which has served as a nice overflow area for a couple of large gatherings.  But most of the time, I just want it to be weed-free and still attractive. Another steep hill from here goes up to the sidewalk and street at the very back of my property.

Much Better

That was one wicked virus that hit me on Sunday.  I ran a fever and was pretty much down flat for two days.  That's not long, I know.  But I always think of myself as having such great immunity, so two days of aches and congestion seemed hard to bear.  I took stupid Dayquil, which did nothing for me.  Last night I took two ibuprofen before bed.  Slept well, and sometime in the middle of the night the fever broke and I awoke feeling so much better.  Today I will finally be able to get back to my normal routine.

When I'm sick, I try to remember what it must be like for a friend of mine who has been living with stage 4 cancer for six years.  Yes, that's right, he has beat the odds in longevity.  But he has paid a terrible toll in the ravages both the treatments and the disease have had on his body.  He is a young husband and father of two children.  An amazingly strong, articulate and humorous person, he has devoted these years to not only documenting his experiences, but also speaking openly and honestly about it and about facing death.  He writes profound poetry and prose, sometimes ethereal and sometimes brutally real describing the suffering, pain and emotion he feels.  He provides much help and support for other patients.  Regularly organizes large events to entertain hospitalized patients bringing treats and hilarious costumed friends.  He has participated in various runs and athletic competitions, even right after chemo treatments.  He is a much sought after public speaker.  He recently told us new tumors had formed and were not responding to treatment. There is little chance he will survive this episode more than a few months, and he and his family are preparing.

I thought about my friend while I was sick and wondered how it would be to suffer like that day in and day out for the majority of the time over a period of years.  It puts my own little cold and fever in perspective.  I tried not to whine.  Not even to myself.  And when I felt that great relief after the fever broke, I again remembered my friend, and thousands of others, who never get that relief.  They learn to live with suffering. 

I am lucky, I know.  And grateful.  And I'm glad to be feeling much, much better.

Refuge

At Bear River Bird Refuge.  Not a terribly birdy day at the refuge on Sunday. Saw pelicans, cormorants, coots, grebes (Western and Clark's), terns, gulls, Snowy Egrets, Great Blue Herons (a couple standing on the roadway), avocets, stilts, other shorebirds I can't name, hawks, but no ducks. Most of the birds were too far out to photograph, although I got a few good shots. The refuge was still and serene and I'm reminded that blam-blam season is not far off. Feeling under the weather with a cold coming on, I probably should have stayed home. But it was still nice to see a few birds out there.

I had planned to work in the yard, of course, with two or three tasks I wanted to accomplish, but I just felt so unmotivated.  And I asked myself why I am always driving myself so hard and forgetting to take a break for some fun now and then.  Well, that sounds a little more pathetic than it should.  After all, I had a family dinner party on Friday at my house.  I had my monthly movie club and luncheon on Saturday.  So, Sunday should certainly have been a back-to-the-yard day.  But honestly, the sore throat and developing head cold discouraged me and I felt more like driving than digging in the dirt. 

And good thing, too.  As it turned out, I developed a full-blown cold like I haven't had in a couple of years. The self-indulgence continued into today.  I still needed to get the kids off to school as usual.  But when I arrived back home at 9, I immediately had a nap and then watched a movie with a late breakfast.  Well, why not?  I can't remember when I last was able to really rest and take care of myself when under the weather.  Now this is a real advantage of retirement!

Fall Planting

What is more predictable than me buying more flowers and sticking them in the ground.  I have found the most wonderful nursery in Salt Lake that sells only perennials and only those that are proven to be drought-tolerant and hardy for our area.  On top of that, the prices are much less than nurseries closer to home, and the plants are so healthy.  It is located quite far west of the city actually, but is an easy drive by freeway about 20 minutes each way.  Well worth going out of your way for such bargains and beauty.  I got a little crazy yesterday and bought 31 plants.  So now I must get to planting.  Plus, I have a number of things I want to transplant -- something is too tall here or too short there, or not thriving in this heat or shade, or encroaching on other plants, that sort of thing.  This is not a one day project.  I have to pace myself.  If I work too hard, I'm crippled up the next day with pain.  Slow and steady.  It may take me all week to get the planting done, but I'm excited to start.  Just as soon as this little rain flurry passes over.

31 pots ready for planting.

My late summer yard this year.

And a little popup rainstorm this morning with a surprise rainbow and hint of a double rainbow, accompanied by thunder and lightning which is serving to keep me indoors for awhile until it passes.  And giving me a moment to blog.

This will soon pass.  Showers are predicted off and on today.  It will keep temperatures comfortable and will force me to come inside and rest periodically.  A very lovely day, really.

Special Enough

I have a bottle of wine I've been saving for a special occasion.  It was given to me a few years ago by a friend when he moved away far from here.  I always thought it would be nice to bring this out to celebrate some big event, some milestone, some really special occasion.  I even imagined opening it when he returned sometime for a visit, when we could share a glass or two and catch up.  But that never happened.  Well, nothing celebratory enough for that bottle has happened.  Oh, I know, I finished the remodel -- that might have been the moment.  But it overlapped with my dad getting sick and it didn't feel like a celebration time.

The other day I saw a quote from someone that said, "Don't save anything for a special occasion."  I immediately thought of the Erma Bombeck quote entitled "If I Had My Life To Live Over."  I won't quote the whole thing here; it's long.  But the point is well made in a single statement:

I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose
before it melted in storage.

Sometimes we imagine something really momentous is just ahead.  Something we've been waiting a long time for.  We put things in cupboards and drawers just awaiting that day.  We'll really celebrate when that day comes, won't we?  And when we look in the cupboard for something else and see that bottle of wine still there that we've been saving for a special occasion, we feel a little sad.  Nothing big enough or important enough has come along to warrant opening that bottle.  How dismal life feels at that moment.

How easily we set ourselves up for disappointment through vague expectations.  Jeez, we could at least have a concrete goal with a definite finish line.  It must be a problem with a lot of women because the Bombeck quote has been ruefully shared over and over again since it was first written in 1979.

So last night I thought to myself, "This is as good as it's going to get, and you'd better drink that wine now while it's good."  And I opened the wine.  A lovely red.  And let it breathe for awhile before pouring a glass.  And then I toasted myself and my friend who gave me the wine, and slowly sipped and savored its loveliness.  Just one glass.  I'll have another tonight and each night until the bottle is finished.

And thus I acknowledge that it's time for me to begin living more in the moment.  The past few years have held more lows than highs.  It's a time of life when things don't necessarily balance out.  So, if I'm alive today, it's a good day.  That's a special enough occasion to open a saved bottle of wine and light that sculpted candle.  Special enough.

Little Blue Heron

When a rare bird is spotted in Utah, the online birder threads light up, and everybody gets out to "chase" the bird.  Last week, someone spotted a rare Little Blue Heron just at Farmington Bay, very close to home for me.  This bird's normal range is more around the Gulf coast and down into South America.  But every five or ten years, one is reported in Utah.  This one drew a lot of attention and photographers as it was hanging out at a pond near a road, easily seen.

I waited about four days before going out.  But on my way home from Ogden on Thursday, I decided to stop and see if it was still there.  It was.  And a couple of birders were already there and pointed it out to me.  Even though it was afternoon, the light was bad and the heron was far out, I was able to get a couple of decent, if dark and blurry, shots.  The bird is still there and I may try to get out again but in the morning when the light is more favorable.  But I'm thrilled to have seen this life bird for me.

What I'm up to

I'll admit I'm neglecting to post here lately.  I'll be back eventually.  But right now I'm doing all my blogging in a private diary with a focus on taking better care of myself.  I write in that blog every single day, keeping track of how much sleep I get, what I eat, the activities I do, how well I do at drinking more water, and how I feel emotionally.  I'm finding this is also a good opportunity to make short lists of important things I need to get done each day as well.  It's all very mundane, but extremely important to me and no-one else.  I write a short entry in the morning and again just before bed.  

This devotion to a daily diary has been very successful in getting me back on track.  So I will continue with it as long as I see a benefit from it and as long as it takes to get some good habits and a good routine in my life.  

I still have a lot of care taking responsibilities, but I finally feel I'm not putting myself forever on the backburner.  I am giving myself daily attention--no more putting that off for the vague future.  But I'm still getting much done around the house and yard, too.

At some point I will return to blogging here, posting pictures of flowers and birds, but hopefully also some original essays and poetry.  I am spending more time again at the piano and and finding a new desire to return to painting and writing. So in those famous words, I'll be baaaack.

Anniversary

This time of year brings remembrances.  And a whole lot of unresolved issues and feelings.  But that's life: things tend to be left open-ended, unanswered.  Five years is a milestone of sorts and a chance to rethink and resolve and look anew to the future.

Upstairs Doors and Floors Remodel Finished

The remodel has really been finished for a couple of months, and I did get the rooms put together for the most part, but never took any pictures because of one thing and another in my life at the time.  Now might be a good time to show a couple of the changes.

New hardwood floor in the living room.  I was originally worried about caring for it, but have found it to be durable and very easy to clean.  I got a low gloss option and it is really ideal in my brightly sunlit living room.  New couch and chairs are sized down to fit better with the large piano.  And a beautiful new railing that I added as a last minute idea.  My contractor is so wonderful to accommodate all my wishes, even in the last stages of the project when he needs to be moving on to the next one.

 Dining room with wood floors.  The flooring also extends down the hallway and stairs, and into the TV room.  I kept carpet in the other two bedrooms.

 Frankie photobombs my dining room picture.

The main change in the bathroom was the shower.  The original shower had a small door and a lowered ceiling and with a yellow tile finish, it was dark and uninviting.  We opened up one whole side of the shower and replaced it with clear glass.  We raised the ceiling to the height of the room, added a shower light and a deluxe dual head fixture.  New paint on the walls finished this one. 

One of these days I'll get some pictures of the new doors and the TV room which were also involved in this remodel.

With the completion of this project, I'm finished remodeling.  There's nothing left to do in the house.  Oh, maybe I'll paint a room now and then and change out curtains and bedspreads.  But this is it for the main things.  I can live in this house a long time and enjoy it.  And when the time comes to sell it, it will already be upgraded and ready to go.

I have to note this was the one thing from my 2013 New Year's resolutions that I didn't complete in 2013, but with its completion a few months into 2014, I don't feel too badly.

Spring 2014 - The Yard is Beautiful

Almost nothing makes me happier than the day Alberto's crew comes to do the spring cleanup in my yard. This year especially so. With the extra family duties, I've had no time to tackle things in the yard. It was such a mess, it was getting depressing. But one day with the cleanup crew, and my yard looks like heaven on earth.

The perennials are growing and a few are blooming. I will have something in bloom from now until well into Fall. I planned it that way. And I'll be adding more perennials again this year as I always do. Alberto's guys always pull up a few thinking they are weeds, but I don't complain much about that since they do such an amazing job.

 Today is an overcast day, so colors in my photos are muted. But the yard is lovely and all the little birds seem to be enjoying it as much as I am.

Frankie checks out the first 10 pots I've planted in annuals so far.  Still have 10 of medium to large size to plant, and another 8 or so little ones.

An Idyl Life

I would like to never go out again.
Out and about, that is.
Just stay indoors.
Or lounge on the patio.
Or stroll around the garden
but seldom farther.

People could visit
And bring wine
and cheesecake
and chocolate
and crusty bread
or flaky croissants
or pain au chocolat.
And pineapple
and tender pea pods.
And shrimp to sauté
in butter and garlic.

And stay too late
and drink too much
and have to sleep over.

We'd walk around the morning yard
Picking weeds and flowers.
Filling bird feeders
and baths.
And then coffee and cheesecake
for breakfast.

And say goodbye
and all return home
for mid-day naps.
Then afterward wash the clothes and dishes
take out the trash, and tidy the place,
just before the guests arrive,

To do it all again.


"An Idyl Life" by Becky Stauffer
copyright 2014

Caregiving

I had just one goal this year: Take care of Becky.  I had the best intentions.  But the truth is, my life has been absorbed by the needs of those around me leaving little time to follow my intentions.  This is not to complain.  Not at all.  I am glad to have the precious time with my grandchildren.  I'm glad to be able to care for my parents, despite the difficult circumstances.  I'm glad to give the love and support my bereaved friends need.  It would be easier if all of these needs hadn't come at the same time.  But they did and I find myself more and more short on time and energy.  I've had to put my needs on a back burner for now.

I'm happy to report that my dad has reached something of a stable point.  His health is still frail and his memory is only functioning at maybe 30 percent, but a plateau is still something to appreciate.  As a result mom is managing better on her own without as much help from all of us, and I am driving to Ogden fewer times a week.  I may be able to get down to one trip a week now.

And I will have some respite from my regular daily childcare duties when the Brazilian grandparents of my grandchildren arrive the end of this month.  They will stay all summer and I will be freed up until fall.

And things are changing in my friends' lives, too.  One has sold her house and is moving to another state.  Another may do the same.  All three are doing better all the time and filling their lives with new challenges and responsibilities.

Life is returning to a "new normal".

As things ease up on me in the coming weeks, I need to revisit that goal and start looking after my own health and well-being.  So much I want to do.  But first I will catch up on sleep.  Again.