I had just one goal this year: Take care of Becky. I had the best intentions. But the truth is, my life has been absorbed by the needs of those around me leaving little time to follow my intentions. This is not to complain. Not at all. I am glad to have the precious time with my grandchildren. I'm glad to be able to care for my parents, despite the difficult circumstances. I'm glad to give the love and support my bereaved friends need. It would be easier if all of these needs hadn't come at the same time. But they did and I find myself more and more short on time and energy. I've had to put my needs on a back burner for now.
I'm happy to report that my dad has reached something of a stable point. His health is still frail and his memory is only functioning at maybe 30 percent, but a plateau is still something to appreciate. As a result mom is managing better on her own without as much help from all of us, and I am driving to Ogden fewer times a week. I may be able to get down to one trip a week now.
And I will have some respite from my regular daily childcare duties when the Brazilian grandparents of my grandchildren arrive the end of this month. They will stay all summer and I will be freed up until fall.
And things are changing in my friends' lives, too. One has sold her house and is moving to another state. Another may do the same. All three are doing better all the time and filling their lives with new challenges and responsibilities.
Life is returning to a "new normal".
As things ease up on me in the coming weeks, I need to revisit that goal and start looking after my own health and well-being. So much I want to do. But first I will catch up on sleep. Again.