Monday, April 6, 2009

Spackle and other beauty secrets you can learn on QVC

Before I canceled my Dish TV, I surfed the channels, looking to see if there was anything I would really, really miss once it was gone. I found myself actually watching QVC -- more than once. I don't know why, I guess it just fascinated me the things they offered to sell, the patronizing sales techniques they employed, and the endless people who seemed most willing to buy and buy and buy.

Like jewelry -- really overpriced jewelry, from what it looked like. "Hurry, just 800 of these left and you won't see it here again until Fall. And on the phone we have Dorothy, what did you buy today, Dorothy?" (Dorothy sounds verrrry sleepy, why is she talking so slowly?). "Ah'm getting the triple faux silver faux ruby and faux diamond bracelet. Ah got it last year, and Ah loved it so much, Ah bought another one fer mah daughter." "Oh, Dorothy, you smart woman, taking advantage of our three easy payments of just $75. You are one of the lucky ones to jump right on it. Thanks, so much for calling, dear."

That might sound like an exaggeration. If you think so, I know for sure you've never watched QVC.

Little did I know when watching a makeup show another day, I would learn something I could really use. It seemed the majority of the products were some kind of "spackle" -- foundation spackle, lip spackle, eye spackle. Who thinks of these names? An exotic woman was applying layer after layer of foundation on a lovely young woman -- more like plastering than spackle in my opinion, but I'm no expert. Of course, when they showed the before picture, the girl already had a perfect complexion. When they brought out the bronzer, the girl squealed with joy. I found it impossible to look away.

I should not have laughed. When I gave myself a black eye a couple of weeks ago, I remembered the spackle idea. Well surely that technique would work with my ordinary department store foundation. I know how to spackle. I've patched up holes in the wall before painting. This can't be hard. I tried it to moderate success. Now two and a half weeks later, I'm still spackling, with just a small bruise remaining.

So I learned, that there was nothing I would miss all that much on Dish TV. I learned to think spackle when applying foundation. And I've now learned that a black eye lasts about three weeks.


Jacqui Binford-Bell said...

Course I am a graduate of theater makeup and know a lot of tricks but am at the age I only go to that length in extreme cases. What you see is what you get.

Interesting that you are canceling DishTV. I am going on a year of no DirecTV. I frankly just got tired of paying for things I never watched. But when I realized I was paying for 11 religious channels I did not even believe in we came to a parting of the ways.

They thought I would be back. If they offered just the local channels for less than $10 I might because I live in a valley with no reception. But with my satellite internet I watch CNN and ABC and MSNBC and movies from Netflix. And in the last year I have been amazed at how much you can watch on the internet without having to see the commercials.

Did you know an hour of Boston Legal is only 38 minutes on DVD without the commercials? So the question becomes why do we pay so much to be pitched to?

In these trying economic times many people are deleting satellite and cable TV and the frills packages on their land lines if not the land line itself.

bekkieann said...

I seem to be following the same route you took. I've not missed Dish. The local channels can be iffy at times, but I live with it. As you say, there is so much news video you can just watch on the internet. And I started getting my first Netflix movies last week and am very happy with that low-cost service.

It will be a big step for me to give up the land line. But then, I thought the same thing about Dish.

Jacqui Binford-Bell said...

Cell service is so iffy here I have held on to the land line but have the most basic of services with it. So basic the taxes run more than the service.

Would love to get rid of it but since Qwest has also failed on every item of its contract with the state it looks as if our electric coop which also provides my internet satellite will very soon be providing our land lines.

And be government funded by the stimulus package that is designated to increase communication access to rural areas. That could also end up meaning another TV translator tower or two.